Crunchberries

-This is the dawning of the Age of Crunchberrius!
-Been spending most our lives living in a crunchy berridise!

Animals, animals!

I'm always talking and talking, on and on, blah blah blah, and it's always about the same thing: animals.

Information You Are Dying to Know

The up-and-coming band POST NO BILLS will be playing a show this Wedesnay. Ha, ha, ha - I mean Wednesday! Ha!

Cataclysmic Dog Biscuits

Let's stick to the point, people. The name of this blog is Ballpoint Penis. Any extraneous discussions not relating to either Ballpoints or Penii will be deleted immediately by the moderator.

Chinese History

In studying Chinese history, I've discovered a disturbing fact.

WHAT IS KNOWN ON THE WEST COAST AS CHOW MEIN IS ACTUALLY REFERRED TO, ON THE EAST COAST, AS LO MEIN, AND VICE-VERSA.

As an addendum to MYU's post

I would like to add that, in her case, the adjective 'cheeky' holds a double-meaning.

Please

She lifted her tear-stained face and whispered in the softest of whispers, "make love to me, burpy one."

Map-making

Friends, friends! What do you know about the timeless art of map-making? Nothing? Then prepare to be enlightened!

Contours and other thoughts

The contours of the human foot are less delicate than-

Wait! Hold on- I hear a duck quacking. I think it's inside my house. If it teaches me to fly, I'll give it all my gold records.

For some, it's cold inside too.

My back itches. I am simply too proud to scratch it myself!

dandelion-yellow

Her face was brick-red and the sky was grape-purple. My tears were as clear as a running stream and my shirt, also transparent, glistened in the sunlight. My pants were plant-green.

My experience

I've been in the music business all my life, but never have I actually sat down and watched a movie - that is, until now.

In summation

I disagree with Mr. Santana on this issue.

麦当劳

Have you fellows tried the new Dante's McFlurrno? Ha!

Ha, ha ha ha!

Ha ha!

Ha!!! Ha Ha Ha!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dante's McFlurrno!

He suckled upon her breast

Chapter 1
He lifted her shirt and began to suckle upon her breast.

Chapter 2
He suckled and suckled.
Oh, how he suckled.

Chapter 3
He finally finished suckling.

FIN